Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Hippo gnu deer
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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