Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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