3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
