Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize