All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
