Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
