i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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