Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
