I'd wear matching sweaters with you
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
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I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
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you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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