Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
