Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
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Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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