nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
A+ Viking dick
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
