dude i'm inner monologue high
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
