They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Are we still banned from the library?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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