I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
