I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
she pinky promised me she was 18
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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