another moral hangover. fuck.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
