what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
