I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
