Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize