you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
