Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
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