yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
