Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
