D3 body, D1 cock
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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