I wish life had little blips of pornography
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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