i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
