I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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