What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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