If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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