Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I am spending my child support on dildos
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
