Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize