So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
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Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
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Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize