Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
