ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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