You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
