i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize