i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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