haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
