Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
