i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
