That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
