You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
