I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize