Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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