So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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