There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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