i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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