I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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