I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
We're too hungover to prance.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
